I'm always a big reader and anytime there's a section or season of my life that I'm nervous about, I will read anything I can to prepare myself. So naturally when I got married, I began reading relationship books and researching tools for maintaining my connection with my husband. I've learned so much and it's only natural that I share with all of my couples what they can expect. So I'm going to start a series on my blog called "Marriage Moment" where I talk about relationship advice for the significant other. Today, I'm going to start with a book list.
It started from recommendations and from our pre-marital counseling (which I recommend for EVERY couple). And I hope this list will help you find something that works for your marriage. Not every couple is the same, but there are many ways to find help for your relationship. Even if you don't need help, sowing good seeds into your marriage and continuing to look for improvement is very commendable.
So without further ado, here are some readings that helped our marriage:
1. Real Marriage: The Truth About Sex, Friendship, and Life Together by Mark & Grace Driscoll
Our friends recommended this book to us and it has been indispensable. This is one of the few books we've actively read out loud to each other. It has helped us with issues that stem from the hurts and challenges we've faced in our lives before meeting each other. Learning to deal with our past, and having patience for my significant other's past can help side step any massive misunderstandings and lead to calmer interactions.
When we were getting prepared for our wedding, Josh and I were doing pre-marital counseling with our officiant. It was one of the single most important things we did to prepare for marriage that I cannot recommend it enough to new couples. One of the things we did was go through these workbooks (One for men and one for women) as homework and then came together to discuss them with the counselor. These are great for identifying pain points and non-negotiables in our marriage.
3. The Bible
No matter what faith you are, read the commanding text. Since we are Christian, that was the bible for us. Having a root in faith, we can build our relationship on the love that exists because of God. It was so important to us to always come back to the text that governs our faith. I'm still studying this one, and I doubt that I'll ever finish.
4. Total Money Makeover by Dave Ramsey
One of the main causes of divorce in America stems from money. Coming together on our finances and keeping the same goals are monumental in diminishing the money mistakes that can happen with new couples. Do not skip this one! Even if you have money, it is so important to be on the same page regarding finances. Even better, get Dave Ramsey's full Financial Peace University course. This can help with getting out of debt, saving for a house, saving for children, and retiring smartly. Definitely a good purchase.
Hopefully some of these books will resonate with you and your significant other. I'll keep you in the loop if I find any new readings. Let me know in the comments below if you have any good suggestions!
Happy anniversary to my husband. <3